Battling with Discontentment + Choosing Contentment


Contentment is a virtue that I am still learning. Because, quite honestly, it is hard to be at complete peace with myself when I know that I am not yet who I want to be. When I was younger, I thought that by now I would have my degree, be living in Manhattan, and working for a renowned magazine company. Boy, was I wrong.

Not that it is too late for me, but society has taught me to place unrealistic timeframes on my goals instead of teaching me to go at my own pace. By 22, you have to graduate college and by 23, you have to secure your career. By 25, you should be married and by 26, you should have kids.

I am three months shy of turning 25 and I am still in college, have not made any major career moves, and I am definitely not getting married or having kids anytime soon. Yet, I often feel like I am not progressing because the older I get, I am reminded of what I don't have.

And it is so easy to allow my stagnation and my failures to dictate my sanity. I have a right to be disappointed in myself for not going after my dreams, right?! I have a right to be upset that things did not turn out the way I had envisioned, right?!

Wrong. Choosing to be discontent only hinders my progress. But how do I choose to be at peace with myself although I am still evolving? How do I learn to accept my failures instead of condemning myself for them?

The key to contentment is deliberately choosing to live in the present, and not giving the past nor the future the power to influence today. It is not allowing my past failures or my "what could've been" determine my here and my now.

Trust me, contentment is not easily attained. I am still teaching myself to be at peace with the season I am in today, while realizing that this season won't last always. It is a great feeling to know that I don't have to have it all figured out. And that the me I am today is enough. I do not have to succumb to societal standards or feel pressured by my peers into doing things I eventually want to do, but may or may not be ready to do. Contentment is more than just trusting God's timing, it is managing the time we are given: the 24 hours in each day we are allotted by God.

If you, like me, are battling with discontentment, my prayer is that today you choose peace.
Peace that extends to every "today" you will face.

0 comments